Grocery Envy

 I just returned from a wonderful trip back home.

I visited with friends and family, went sales tax-free (!) clothing shopping, attended a BEAUTIFUL wedding (bride: younger sister of one of my besties; groom: the 'Harold Hill' to my Senior year 'Marian the Librarian'), and was able to unwind in the wide-open spaces of Minnesota.

Don't we clean up nicely?

You'd never even know Rachel and I were climbing over the dessert table on our hands and knees placing flowers only an hour before.

Ahh, the things we do for (other peoples') love :)

More than anything, being back in Minnesota was a bit of a mental vacation. One I needed more than I realized.  

One night I drove up to Bloomington to spend the night at my best friend Maggie's new house. We decided to have a "Patio Party" since they had just gotten deck furniture for their backyard sitting space. 

Maggie and her boyfriend made a wonderful dinner, and halfway through I found myself getting strangely envious(?) of the bowl of bing cherries sitting on the table.

Out of nowhere I started talking about how really the only cherries I get these days are the Maraschinos that come in my Daiquiris.  I'm cheap when it comes to buying groceries here because everything is so bloody expensive, but still. I had never in my life looked at a fruit that necessitates you spit out its pit so longingly.

Maggie diagnosed it. I have severe "Grocery Envy."

It's so true. 

My groceries consist of the same 8-10 items each time I go shopping. Why don't I branch out, you ask?

Well, A) I'm obsessively compulsive about staying within my grocery budget and B) I have to carry these groceries up 3 flights of stairs, so, I've got a pretty good handle on what I can and can't haul up without dropping something or breaking a finger. It's frustrating, not to mention morally difficult deciding between which I need more each week: MILK or WINE?

So, this week, in an attempt to self-medicate, I bought a pack of Fudgesicles. Yep, mindblowingly exciting........

This whole "Grocery Envy" led me to realize I also had "Patio Envy," "Car in the Garage Envy" and "No-Jackhammers-Right-Outside-Your-Window-At-8am Envy."

But, seeing as I was home for a solid 9 days, I made sure to get my fix of all things envy-inducing. 

Yes, it was a mental vacation.... But also a mental kick in the ass.

During the last few months I've found myself becoming more and more homesick. 

Ick. I even hate typing the word "homesick" out. 

I'm on my way to doing what I love here in NYC, but I began asking myself how much could I even love what I'm doing if I'm missing the people back home so much it literally hurts? How many times could I mentally handle getting home from work at 3AM, only to find that I can't unzip my own dress, get really frustrated/stupidly emotional and resigning myself to sleeping it? (True story)

How long can I keep going with 98% of my support system 1,200 miles away?

Well, I still don't have an answer to those questions, but I did have a handful of great conversations with people who understand my big dream, understand where I come from, understand what I'm feeling and understand the mess these things make when combined.

I was telling two of my very favorite people, over a fruit tart w/ NO CHERRIES, that I feel I've reached a glass ceiling in this level of the "Act On TV" game. I can clearly see what's beyond the glass and feel I'm close to breaking through, but I'm pushing and pushing and not getting anywhere. And, like trying in vain to unhinge my shoulders so I could unzip that stupid white dress, that makes me frustrated and overly-emotional and sometimes, really just ready to call it a day.

I received the following no-nonsense directive:

"Stop pushing and start throwing rocks."

I laughed, and then thought for a second. Duh. To Hell with decorum. I'm going to start throwing some  rocks. And then move onto large, early 1990s-model television consoles if I have to.

I was reminded that all things have an "end time," and that it's ok whenever you reach that. Life's about compromise and figuring out what you really want, even if what you really want is something you ran away from at one point in time. 

So, yeah. Minnesota was a good time. Many thanks to all those who I had great chats with, provided meals that didn't take the form of peanut butter and for helping me find the motivation and inspiration for these up-coming months.

XO.

Oh, and in other news, I'm still doing a lot of background work, preventing my "Boardwalk Empire" children (and myself) from being kicked in the face by camels... 

(that's my "They Don't Pay Me Enough For This" face....)

 and waiting for my demo reel to be finished.

Oh, and waiting for this to air! I think my stint as Jane Fonda's assistant appears in the 3rd episode..... Stay  tuned. 

~~~~~~

My May Top Ten

Here's a run-down of my "top" 10 moments of May... so far.

1) Summer is (nearly) here. And things are getting GREEN. Yay!

Apparently it'll seem like I'm living in a tree house by the time my trees fully bloom. Totally OK with that. And fitting, since my upstairs neighbor is half-ape.

2)Finding (the original) Chocolate Koala Yummies at my neighborhood Greek Market. 

KOALA YUMMIES, y'all! You know, the wafer-type, koala-shaped cookie, jet-pumped full of chocolately-who-knows-what-insides that were popular circa 1996? Yeah. Found 'em. 

Well, the Asian version of them. Fun fact? They're called Koala's March in Asia. Impress your friends with that one.

3) Being chosen to play the assistant to Jane Fonda's 

character in Aaron Sorkin's new HBO show "The Newsroom." Still no lines.... But I did get a special wardrobe, had my hair and make-up done in the chair directly between Jane and Sam Waterston (of Law & Order fame) while they rehearsed lines and spoke of Hollywood past, had a very-featured scene in which I'm Jane's right-hand lady and get into the limo with her at the end of the scene, and had my own stand-in! (aka: the person who stood in my place when it was raining, when the cameras had to be re-configured, etc.) Despite the fact it was more humid than I imagine Hell to be that day, and the hair dressers earned their salary trying to keep my naturally curly hair from pulling a Diana Ross, I had THE BEST TIME. I met Aaron Sorkin and he personally thanked me after we wrapped, Jane is just lovely in person and Sam Waterston is perhaps the nicest male principle I've ever worked with.
What. A. Treat.
Oh! And we even had our own paparazzi that day... so, I "Googled" and found a random passerby's pic. This hardly justifies the scene, as I'm now being "sent away for a moment," but still .... (I'm on the far left w/ the appointment book... Jane's trying to get into the limo...) This episode won't air until late summer. I can't wait to see how it turns out! I have some other great stories from that day, but they're better in-person ;)

4) Calling my Mom crying for the first time since I moved here. 

Yes. Truth. It's funny how life progresses in NYC.... especially in the industry I'm in. The higher the highs.... the lower the lows. Well, last week I was in quit a snit.

Yes, this is a highlight. 

You learn a lot from the seemingly rock-bottom moments in life.... especially when you hit rock bottom, your umbrella breaks in a rainstorm and all you want is a Dairy Queen Confetti Cake Blizzard only to realize there are no DQs in NYC.

 This was one of those real "son of a b*tch" moments in life.

However, it made me realize that if nothing more was meant to happen for me during this crazy adventure I started a year ago, then that's OK. 

I've been blessed with what's happened thus far, and can be content with that.

5) Losing all hope in the human race after watching a kid, in full view of everyone, whip out his you-know-what and pee on a tree..... right off one of the busiest walking paths in CENTRAL PARK..... in mid-afternoon...... while his mom patiently waited for him to finish.

I foresee some potential jail-time in this kid's future. 

Said hope in the human race was restored by this little girl:

Adorable.

6) Learning that an (accidental) Vitamin B-complex overdose makes for an interesting and ugly situation.

I've always been a bad bruiser. My friend Rachel says under my mid-20 exterior lies an 80-year-old woman.

But, add in too much Vitamin-B and clumsily bang into your bathroom sink?

You get a very impressive five-color bruise as big as a frying pan, that sticks around for 2+ weeks.

Wearing shorts out in public has been interesting. 

(I'm sparing y'all the picture.) 

7) Having one of those quintessential "NYC acting" moments in my Primetime TV class.

You know those actresses you see in a comedy sit-com? The ones that take themselves FAR too seriously? The ones that dress the part to a "T," even if that means dressing the part of their 'character' from 'The Playboy Club' (it was canceled for a reason, people.)? The ones that are offered an acting adjustment from the casting director and close their eyes, take a deep breath and use their hands to physically illustrate taking said deep breath and "truly and deeply feeling the adjustment within their character's soul"??

Ok, yeah. I witnessed one of those first-hand in class last week.

Far more entertaining than annoying.


8) Breaking into the exclusive TV STAND-IN Club.
______________________________________

stand-in (stndn)

n.

1. One who substitutes for an actor while the lights and camera are adjusted or during hazardous action. ________________________________________________

Additionally, a stand-in has to be of similar height, hair color and complexion of the actor in which they are standing in for. So, over the past few months I've seen many requests for 5'7", light brown haired females for stand-ins. The only problem? YOU MUST HAVE STAND-IN EXPERIENCE.
How was a little Midwesterner like me, who had NO stand-in experience, ever supposed to land one of these jobs? Well, two ways:

1) Lie and say you have experience,
and then pray your "experience" doesn't get questioned when you fail to understand what to do when hired for a job.....

or,

2) Submit for background work, but get a call from the casting agency telling you you're a perfect fit for a stand-in position they're looking to fill and that even though you have ZERO actual experience they're going to let you have a shot at it. This nearly never happens.

But, the Gods were on my side, or perhaps felt sorry about the whole Dairy Queen debacle, and decided to go with #2. Win.

Soo.... I stood-in on "Royal Pains" for multiple days for not one, but TWO different actresses. One being Ashley Williams, who I wasn't familiar with, but I had grown up watching her sister Kimberly in "Father of the Bride" Parts 1 & 2 (and her brother-in-law is Brad Paisley). Pretty sweet.
Ashley's character in the show has prosopagnosia (face blindness) and falls through a coffee table. I, sadly, did not get to go through the table for her --- stupid Union rules, but I did get to be her photo-double, so that when she looks into the mirror, she sees my face instead of her own.
I can't wait to see how the special effects work out for that!

So, I've officially been welcomed into the Stand-In Club, and look forward to more of that work.


9) "Call Me Maybe."
Not even kidding. I really heart this song and am not even ashamed to admit it.
It's like a big shot of Espresso minus the $3.50 price tag.

10) Seeing these kidlets on Friday:

I'm jetting off to Boca Raton to see my niece, nephew, brother and sis-in-law. Can't wait.



I hope you all had an equally wonderful, if not vitamin deficient, May!


Until next time,
~B

Happy Mom's Day!

Wishing everyone a happy Mother's Day!!

I'd like to thank my own Momma today....

She's been super-duper supportive, patient and encouraging this past year. And Lord knows she never needed to be, considering her only child up and decided to move to NYC to pursue an acting career... YIKES.

Thanks for everything, Mom. I love you!

I'd also like to say "Happy Mother's Day" to my aunts, sister-in-law, "adopted aunts" (you know who you are) and all of the other inspirational and, sometimes, "mother-like" women in my life who were instrumental in making me who I am today.

BUT... 
Perhaps, above everyone else... I want to wish Happy Mother's Day to an extremely important someone we lost unexpectedly on this holiday exactly 5 years ago.....

....one of my very best friends, My Grandma Irene.

Dear Gramma,

Happy Grandma's Day!!

Where have the years gone? It seems just yesterday you were reading "One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Blue Fish" to me on your big, flower-print couch. 

I can't tell you how much I miss watching "Father of the Bride: Part II", drinking wine and sitting on the vine-covered front porch with you. 

I wish you were here to see all of the exciting things we're all are up to these days... And, I wish you were here this Mother's Day so we could take you to Bachmann's for some flowers and then to Weiderholt's for dinner and an Old Fashioned.

But then again, I know that the way things worked out were, perhaps, all for the best. Because I'm positive that now you're more here with me in NYC than you ever could've been while still living in your green stucco house on South 2nd Street in Cannon Falls. And I guess I'm OK with that.

We're all doing just fine, but we miss you.  

Love you always and much,

Brooke

Happy Mother's Day to you and yours.

XOXO

~B

"The Girls" .... and the Big White Dress: Part 2

Where in the hell has the time gone? 

It seems freakishly impossible that we are nearly into May. MAY, people! 

Wow. Ok, so what's been going on with me? Well, really just the same-old-same-old over here in Apartment 4A. Some highlights from the past month:

- Adding "The Good Wife" and "Royal Pains" to the list of shows I've worked 'background' on, as well as doing my first movie! On "The Good Wife" I played a lawyer, and told my Dad he better relish the moment, as it's the closest either of his children will ever get to following in his professional footsteps. I think he was proud..... 

- Nearly (literally) running into Angela Lansbury in Eataly (Mrs. Potts!!)

- flying home to Minnesota for what seemed a hot second for my cousin Kristin's Bachelorette Weekend. Oh what fun! A party bus + one stereotypical Wisconsin townie bar + a few "classier" bars + 25 ladies celebrating one of their bestie's last fling before the ring = EPIC-NESS.

Although, word to the wise.... Be sure you're properly stretched before you decide to take a spin on a stripper pole...... Just trust us on this one. 

So, life's been good......

........ and it only gets better as I fly home again this week for the wedding of one of my most favorite people.

(If you're new to the blog, and need a little background on "The Girls" (aka, myself and my two cousins), check out 

the post I dedicated to my cousin Ashlan right before her big day.)

Kristin's getting married!

Yes, my second sister-cousin, the girl who can crack a neck (she's a future chiropractor!) like no one's business, and the girl who can bust a mad freestyle-dance move at any given bar or wedding reception, is tying the knot on Saturday, and I couldn't be more excited for her.

I could sit here and rehash the entire 26 years we've been related; regaling you with tales from our tutu and sequin-rich baby ballerina days (we played it all - Dandelions, Yankee Doodle Dandies, you name it), our what-in-hell-were-we-thinking-getting-a-perm days, our infamous family vacations to the West Coast and Disney World days, our competitive (well, competitive until I decided to stop pretending I was at all athletic) and wonderfully fun middle school and high school days, and of course, tales from the more recent days when we three Girls went our own directions to claim our separate paths in this big world.......

-OR-

I can SHOW you just how much I heart this girl.

Let's take a trip down memory lane, shall we?

Kristin and I have done it all together. 

We've seen the world. 

From the grandeur of Buckingham Palace....

and the "Bali Hai" beaches of Kauai.....

to some of the 'finest' backwoods bars of Wisconsin.

(PS- Only if you're really lucky does your backwoods bar come complete with a suspected outlaw named Garbage.)

We rode in style.

From our  matching Mazda 626s in high school...

                                            

to our families' matching PT Cruisers in Hawaii  (luxury at its finest.......)

to, shopping carts...... well....... because sometimes there just isn't a better mode of transportation when celebrating one's 25th birthday. 

We've tried to keep it classy over the years...

Weddings.

Golf Tournaments.

Fancy birthday dinners.

mostly succeeding...

but, once in awhile.......

 failing horribly....

These outfits..... I can't.

Bachelorette Shenanigans

?

Really. Can't take us anywhere. Especially not on a boat with unlimited Bud Light.

We survived HURRICANE IRENE together here in NYC

                                 

Mainly in thanks to trail mix, chips & salsa and an assortment of adult beverages.

And, after ol' Irene blew through, we decided doing cartwheels in the middle of 8th Avenue was the absolute best way to celebrate.

   

We've had some times we'll never forget....

 (and maybe a few times we *should* forget....)

And, we've made it through some terribly hard goodbyes.

But, now with Kristin marrying her absolutely amazing fiance Grant next Saturday, and as we transition into the next chapter(s) of "The Girls"...

I raise my glass, and wish the best for these two,

knowing that "perfection" doesn't even begin to describe their future.

Love you, Sissy.

xo,

Brookie

~*~*~